Wow, I felt like Chris Tucker today. You know, in Rush Hour 2. Here's what happened. I was rushing home to change to go to work on my Comp video. I had on one of those sweatshirts with the big double-sided pocket in the front. This pocket contains one of those granola bars in the green wrapper--Oats 'n Honey flavor. The kind that Christine used to have all the time. So my dad is in the doorway and I'm trying to get by and I turn slightly to the left when I walk briskly through. As I do so, the metal doorknob smashes into my groinal area. Little do I know, the granola bar is hanging slightly down, acting as a protective barrier. The granola bar is smashed to bits, but my genitals are still intact. I've never been so thankful for the existence of granola bars. If you're still having trouble connecting this to Chris Tucker in Rush Hour 2, think of the scene at the end where Zhang Ziyi is chasing him around the casino and finally stabs him in the benjamins.
Today, I've witnessed Benton in nothing but overalls and underwear, Adam in the attire of a skank, and Andy as a woman with, believe it or not, some decent curvage. My life will never be the same.