If I were to recount the events of yesterday in a series of short sentence fragments, I imagine it would go a little something like this: Wake up. Computer. Adam's. Watch Nick Arcade. Play Super Smash Bros Melee. Ping Pong. Swim. Taco Bell. Megan's Grad Party. Eat. Pool. (Billiards.) Attack strangers with Nerf balls. Go home. Sleep.
If he's really like a spider, shouldn't Spiderman's web gunk come out of his butt?